Snapshot: hilarious conversations

So here's three conversations that made me smile. (also, I've decided to stop apologizing whenever I haven't posted in a while....kinda makes me feel guilty and then I REALLY don't want to write a blog post. So I'm skipping it!)

I recently chopped off 12 inches of hair and donated it to Locks of Love. I work with kids and sometimes they say funny things. The day after I've cut pretty much all of my hair off, I'm playing with a child when out of the blue she said to me, "Who are you?" I guess she didn't recognize me....it was so random.

And then the other day, I was at a concert, standing in line to buy a t-shirt and there were these two guys behind me, being macho and tough. I wasn't really paying attention to their conversation until one guy exclaimed, "There's an app for YOUR FACE!" and the other guy (without missing a beat) said, "Isn't that the camera app?" Gotta love eavesdropping.

And the last conversation happened just a couple of minutes ago. I was talking to my sister and said, "Yeah, I'm definitely not a romantic person." to which my sister said, "Duh." with no hesitation whatsoever. Smmmooooottth.

Kleptomania

You probably didn't know this...but I'm a kleptomaniac. I steal. All the time.

Really.

Not in the way you'd imagine though. I steal words. Phrases. Odd gestures. Weird mannerisms. Funky personality traits.

I think I do this compulsively because I'm a Writer and I'm always picking up things that I can work into my writing. That's why people fascinate me so much. I love people-watching. I also love how people talk, what they say, what riles them up. It's great.

Today for example, I saw a flustered mom who had a handful of children who were misbehaving. I was trying to remain inconspicuous because I was already feeling like she was going to be embarrassed by her son's outburst. But I almost lost my composure and smiled when she exasperatedly said,

"I'm fixin' to hang you on a clothesline."

I had never heard someone say that before and I loved it. So of course I'm stealing it. I'm adding it to my bag of trademark phrases and southern sayings.

Eavesdropper

This is a conversation I overheard at the gym today and it struck my fancy and I had to write it down.

"I saw Tony the other day..."

"Big Tony?"

"Little Tony who got his eye detached, you call him Big Tony?"

"No, there's two Tonys."